Stuggles as a single mom

This post really is just random. I have a lot on my mind that I need to allow to ooze out my fingers.

Being a single mom is a tough job. I'm sure it is for single dads too, but I cannot speak on their behalf. So onward as a single mom.

One of the biggest struggles I face is being exhausted. I work taking care of kids all day, then come home to my own two children. I love them dearly and enjoy the time we spend together before and after work, but I am physically exhausted. It can be difficult to stay motivated to spend time with them, cook meals, clean house, and everything else that needs to be done before the next day. Throw in the mix two sick children with fevers over 103, throw up, no sleep at night and mommy is ready for a childless vacation!

Balancing being a firm parent and the nurturing mommy can be a difficulty too. I don't want to be too hard on them, but being too soft won't help them at all either. Sometimes it can be hard to find a good balance. Especially on days when they have pushed every button possible. Someday it would be nice to have someone to tag team with.

It is a 24-7 job. Basically a full plate in itself, but someone has to work as well and child labor is not legal (Just kidding of course). So take a full plate add a little more (work) and then add a few sprinkles which we will call a social life and/or the rare date (very rare because few men are willing to consider stepping up if you have kids) and you have a mountain on a small plate. But we have to have that mini social life because you need the interaction and work just doesn't count. Hum, can we just cancel it all and take a nap?

Little boys and their mommy

First, I love being a mom to little boys. They have their challenges, but there are so many rewards. I know the unconditional love of children, my children. Two little people that I am responsible to God for raising in His ways. Two little people that love me no matter what.

I've been working on teaching Nathanael manners. Sometimes it backfires. The latest has been to not pick his nose and proceed to eat what he fishes out. His newest idea: pick it and give it to mama. Yes, I'm now the booger disposal. Gotta work on that one.

But he can be really sweet. He can tell when I'm not feeling well and will just sit with me, or put his hand on my face and tell me that he loves me and "You okay, mama."

I don't feel like finishing this post, so I'm not going to. Sorry, maybe the next one will be complete.

How to choose...

When you have choices in life that seem hard, how do you choose? I pray, pray, pray. But sometimes it doesn't feel like there is a solid answer. I'm faced with some very big choices in life and don't know which way to turn. All the options will affect the rest of my life, not that every choice doesn't, but these are major. Do I make the career change and go back to school? Basically starting from square one? Do I keep my current career? Do I put myself out there to possibly find happiness? Or possibly get hurt again?

My grandfather instilled in me that life isn't always easy. We make bad choices and we make good choices. We find happiness and sometimes we get hurt. It is what you do with those outcomes that make you who you are.

The big question...Am I willing to make choices that could result in outcomes I don't want?

Does it ever get easier?

That is the question I keep posing to myself as a single parent. I still have yet to find an answer. It seems as though it has been storming in my world lately. One crisis, and then another, and then another. Rain, rain, go away! Don't go bother someone else, just go away!

My Weekly Findings!

CVS

4 Packages of 240 count Playschool Baby wipes $7.49 Each CLEARANCE $1.87 Each

Soft Soap Pump $7.99 Down to $5.99 w/coupon

Soft Soap Refill $3.99 Down to $1.99 w/coupon

Purchased M&Ms and Green tea for snack :)

Bringing my total after coupons & CVS bucks to $5.14 including my snacks :)

Originally $48.17 ! Savings of 89%

(would have been $1.56 with out my M&Ms and green tea )

Walgreens

Coloring book for DS $1.00 Clearance $.50

Bic Soliel Razor $5.99 (I think or 6.99) Clearance $1.79

3 x 4-pack Bic Soleil Cartridges $6.99 each SALE $5.29 each w/coupon $3.29 each

2 Handwarmers Clearance .24 each (I think regularly 2.50ish each)

2 Splenda $4.99 each Sale $3.50 each w/ coupon $2.00 each

Total After coupons and RR $10.93

Originally $43.04 Savings of 75%

Grand total for today $16.07!

Original Total $92.21

** I didn't factor the CVS bucks I got back or the BIC coupon I got with the razor into that total. That is what came out of my pocket today. If I did, it would have been $6.07 plus the CVS bucks I got for specific items (little swimmers, wipes, etc)**

Couponing my way to organized

My mom has been sending me coupons for months. Envelopes stuffed to the brim. Coupons for everything from canned soups to panty liners. And while I appreciated her effort at the time, I did not understand why couponing was such a big deal. At that time, I use to make my grocery list and thumb through the coupons and pick out coupons for what I had on my list. Other times, I would take my coupons to the store and thumb through it on occasion while walking past items I thought I "might" have a coupon for in my organizer. Saving me .50¢, or $1.00 here and there, but nothing to write home about and nothing that really made a dent in my ever increasing grocery bill.


I heard about people using coupons and spending mere pennies for hundred dollar grocery bills, but I could not seem to make it work for me and I couldn't figure out how to properly organize my coupons. So I gave up. Yes, gave up in frustration. My coupons sat for two or three months collecting dust on my bookshelf. Then something happened; I gave birth to my youngest child. It struck me that as a single mother to two children with a dwindling balance in my bank account, I was going to have to find a way to stretch my already tight budget even further. Thank you FMLA for 12 weeks off to be with my newborn, but 6 weeks of paid maternity leave would have been better!!

So I set off to find out the keys to making couponing work. I searched the latest blogs and the hottest coupon websites to find out how the "pros" made it work for their families. Little did I know what I was in for! There is so much information out there that it is information overload in the beginning. But I persevered and now feel more confident in my couponing abilities.

I finally have a VERY organized coupon book that makes sense to me. What works for one person may not work for another. Finding a system that works for you is key!

This super organization has transferred into other areas of my life. I was never overly organized and when my first child came along, all organization went out the window. It was all about learning how to be a mom and make it through the sleepless days and nights. When I finally felt like I was able to organize my home and life, I found out I was expecting child number two. Between taking care of my firstborn, being a single mom, and pregnant, organization was optional. My house was clean and safe, just not well organized. I could not find anything! Nothing had a permanent "home"; it kept being put away where there was room and I could never remember where I put "it". After my second child was born, my mom came to help me with adjusting to having two children. She is a super organizer and set about to better organize my home. Although to some this might be annoying, to me, after just giving birth and trying to keep up with my two-year-old, she was a God send!

She has returned to her home and my house is still organized. Not %100 the way she left it, because I have gone through and reorganized somethings to where it makes sense to me. Figuring out how to organize my coupons has, in some weird way, helped me feel better and good about my organizational skills and it helped encourage me to have the rest of my life more organized. Maybe it is the instant gratification of being able to go to my coupon book and find exactly what I am looking for and knowing that I have the same ability in the other areas of my life and home.